Surfer's Paradise in 2 days and with a hangover

Surfer’s Paradise is the kind of place that needs to be seen to be believed. For starters, that any country would have a town named Surfer’s Paradise is slightly strange to me as town names are meant to have deep and ancient meanings (San Diego named after Saint Diego, Dartford named after the fording of the River Darenth, London named after the Belgian town of Nodnol) but as part of a marketing campaign in the 1930s the town changed its name and by gum did it work.

Surfer’s Paradise today is like Blackpool, uprooted and moved to the Gold Coast of Australia and then injected with steroids. It is, as one fellow traveller aptly put it, Skeg-Vegas. Giant  gleaming high-rises overlook miles and miles of golden beaches. Tattooed, muscled surfers are everywhere. Never have I felt less tanned in my entire life…and I used to live 5 minutes’ drive from Essex.

Skypoint City

I arrived at Surfer’s with the intention of chilling out for a couple of days before my long trip up to Cairns. This intention was shattered when I was coerced into going clubbing at 10pm by some of my new room mates. Several beers, jager shots and hours later I crawled into bed at 3am. Quite the set up for my first full day in Surfer’s; spent mostly meandering around the town and continuing my trend of visiting high rise observation deck . Tuesday proved slightly more fruitful with another venture to the top of the Skypoint for my ritual ‘coffee in a high place’ and a trip to the highly recommended Infinity attraction; a sort of funhouse of mirrors and special effects. Estimated ride time: 40 minutes. Actual time for me to get around: more like 20minutes. Sufficed to say this is something it’s probably better to do as a group; not that it’s in any way bad. It was a lot of fun. Just a bit short when done on your own.

Surfer’s Paradise is really geared towards the long-term visitor. In the brief couple of days I was there I got the sense that a week here (complete with an all-access pass to all of the local theme parks) is the definitive getaway for a lot of folks in this area. As it was, I merely spent a relaxing couple of days bumming around and attempting (and on one day succeeding) to drink my hostel bar dry of Tooheys. 

Brisbane, Fraser Island and lots of Dingoes

The goal was to be in Brisbane by last weekend and another long journey via greyhound was the most efficient way to do it. I took an overnight break in Byron Bay, where the heavens opened and proceeded to soak me at 8am as I stepped off the night bus. Luckily it dried out as the day went on and I found myself in a hot tub drinking beer at 4pm with a bunch of other reprobates. Hostelling will always be a good way of making friends quickly.

Coopers enjoys the Roar

Upon arriving in Brisbane the next day, hungover and a little disoriented, I met up with the man who had 6 months previously given us all 2 weeks’ notice that he was emigrating; Coopers. Overwhelmed by the emotion of seeing a familiar face, we promptly headed to the nearest pub and had a couple of beers to calm ourselves, before heading out to spend Friday night in the only way you can when the opportunity arises – watching Hyundai A League Football. For a brief ten minute spell it seemed like Brisbane were in trouble, going 1-0 down early. Then for the second time in two days the floodgates opened. This time in the manner of goals. Brisbane were 5-1 up at half-time and 7-1 up by the end. We then discovered they were unbeaten in 32 games and the current A-League champions. Not bad going.

Could be Skippy...probably not though

The Saturday brought us to the Lone Pine Koala Sanctuary; where you can hug Koalas, pet Kangaroos and generally look around all sort of Australian beasties. It killed a few hours, and allowed the chance to get up close with a lot of the wildlife I’d otherwise missed seeing on the Australian leg of my journey so far. However Koala-hugging was off the agenda. They had a disturbing habit of pooping over everyone and at $20 a pop to be soiled, I passed on the opportunity. The rest of the weekend was spent wandering around Brisbane, mostly staying on the South Bank drinking beers and admiring the scenery. Brisbane’s museums are reasonably short on exhibitions right now, with the two biggest currently closed for refurbishment, the town hall also being refurbished and the Museum of Brisbane offering slightly more niche galleries on social commentary.

Dingo pups

Tuesday came and with it came a 5:30am wake up to get to Fraser Island. Fraser Island, it turns out, is the world’s largest natural sand island, supporting dense ecosystem of forests, sub-tropical rainforests and multiple different types of animal. Almost all of them lethal. Of the 10 deadliest snakes in the world, 6 of them can be found on Fraser Island. Wild dingoes are also present in numbers of about 200 and the island is covered with warnings about the dangers. Dingoes, it would seem, really will eat your babies. And your food. And you. They were not to be trifled with (or any other form of desert). Still, I saw a few, including some pups, and they were impressively cute. Just a shame they'd rip my face off given half a chance.

That's a forest, embedded in a sand dune!

Fraser Island itself though is a wonder of nature. A place of incredible beauty and mind boggling natural sights. The fact that such dense forestation can grow on an island comprised almost entirely of sand with no soil is something that I struggled to wrap my head around. It has a multitude of freshwater lakes for swimming in, which I dutifully obliged; which tempers the fact that the ocean surrounding it is completely unusable due to the massive amount of sharks, rays and jellyfish to be found in it. Undoubtedly one of the most spectacular sights was to be found at the top of a 2km long sand dune, which was in the process of covering an entire forest. Having passed through a Saharan tundra of sand banks we scaled the summit to see a living forest extending out far beneath us. Mind well and truly boggled at this stage. 

Shipwrecked on Fraser

The island is awash with things you'd never expect, including the wreck of an old passenger ferry that was washed up here in the 1930s and is now in and of itself a tourist attraction.

After three days on Fraser Island (and a swim in Eli Creek, where you can wade around up to your knees until you suddenly come across a pool that is shoulder deep) it was time to return to Brisbane, with sand absolutely everywhere. In two weeks I will be on a plane leaving Australia from Cairns and in that time I have 1,800km to travel. Looks like I might be getting on a plane earlier than I expected…

Don't let a dingo eat your baby

Sydney

Somewhat famous lndmarks

Sydney has a wow factor that only a city with the kind of iconic landmarks of the Opera House and the Harbour Bridge can provide. Melbourne was a lovely city (and apparently “The Most Liveable in the World” according to something I read in the last couple of days…yeah I can see that) but it lacked the feeling of “welcome to Oz” that Sydney has.

The Fern Enclosure

Wandering around the city on my first day my first sight of the Harbour Bridge/Opera House double team couldn’t have been better; rounding a corner of the Botanical Gardens they suddenly emerged from behind some trees. I was, shall we say, mildly impressed. The rest of the city had the standard features of a major Southern Hemisphere metropolis; a waterfront, some tall and shiny buildings, a massive viewing tower. Yet Sydney also has some of the most amazing public spaces I’ve seen; the Botanical Gardens are a massive reserve of every single different kind of plant, both tropical and non, that you could find. There’s even a fern enclosure. As in an enclosure for ferns. Genius.

Going up the Westfield Tower gives you the best view over the city’s suburbs and coastline (as you’d expect from a 200m high viewing tower), but I got the feeling that the building of some of Sydney’s more modern skyscrapers had somewhat obscured the view of the city itself. Still, I was able to maintain my new tradition of coffees in tall buildings and enjoy the view.

Bondi Beach. It's a beach

Some unseasonably warm weather, even for Sydney, of 34 degrees persuaded me to hit Bondi Beach on the Monday. Famed for its surf and bronzed inhabitants, Bondi Beach is the go-to place for people looking to escape the city and catch some waves. A brief 30 minute bus ride out of town brought me to Bondi and it was…well it was a beach. It’s a nice beach, don’t get me wrong but to be honest, it lives and dies by whether or not you’re there to catch surf/sunbathe or if you’re actually looking for something to do. I never thought I’d find myself wanting for some Blackpool-style slot machines and gaming halls in Australia. Luckily there’s a nice coastal walk you can take that kills an hour or so. And I'd have been far more receptive had I not recently spent a week on a beach in Fiji.

4 Pines "Speciality" Brew

Tuesday brought rain (Rain! In Australia!?) which made my decision to catch the ferry to Manly (another beach location) slightly dubious, yet the 4 Pines microbrewery there made the trip worthwhile; serving excellent beer and some brilliant food.

I was also able to indulge my more cultured side on Tuesday by heading to the Opera House to take in a Bell Shakespeare production of Julius Caesar. In a joke I’ve already made on facebook (but have no problem repeating here) I was slightly hoping for an “et tu Bruce” reference. Regrettably there was none. However the play itself was a damn fine attempt (if slightly strange to hear Shakespeare with an Aussie accent) and Kate Mulvany was excellent as Cassius. Check it out; theatre criticism in my blog. Even I thought that would never happen.

Sufficed to say I’ve fallen a little bit in love with Sydney. As I sat sipping a beer staring at the bridge at dusk I realised I could get used to this town (if not the food prices - $2.50 for a red pepper! $2.50!!) but tonight marks the nightbus to Byron Bay, a stop-over on my route to Brisbane and a friendly face in the form of Coopers. 

Melbourne - Sun, Sea, Staph Infection

The long route back to London continued as I landed in Melbourne at 1am. The plan had been to spend a couple of days here before moving on to Canberra. Of course, that plan didn’t take in to account that I would be spending the first morning in the city in the Emergency wing of St Vincent’s Hospital, conveniently located across the road from my hostel. Cue a rapid change of plans and my staying in Melbourne until Friday. For those who are interested; I ended up being diagnosed with a severe Strep infection and a moderate Staph infection along with a couple of other nasty critters. As you can also tell by the fact I’m writing this blog; I’m on the mend.

Luckily Melbourne is a vibrant city with more than enough to do to keep me entertained for a week. I spent most of Monday and Tuesday am wandering around exploring the city and looking for a book shop (Melbourne, it seems, has a scarcity of them). I also had the chance to find a couple of cool little eateries and Max Brynner's Chocolate Shop; maker of the most chocolatey Mocca I've ever had. 

The very top step of the MCG...it's high

Then I turned my attention to some of the more traditional tourist activities, starting with a trip to the Melbourne Cricket Ground and National Sport Museum. I’m by no means a cricket fan, a fact which seemed to confuse my tour guide, a nice bloke by the name of Peter, but you can’t come to Melbourne as a sports fan and not go and look around this Mecca of sports. It’s a vastly impressive ground, seating 90,000 and the tour was incredibly informative, aided by the fact it was one-on-one. Plus I got to sit in the MCG Members Chairs whilst wearing an England Rugby shirt. That shouldn’t have amused me like it did.

Also worth a look (again as a sports fan) was the National Sports Museum, at the same location if for no other reason than it provides an excellent look into how the always confusing, occasionally entertaining and often violent sport of Aussie Rules football came in to being. I just wish I’d left longer than an hour to look around it.

Great Ocean Road

Wednesday was entirely occupied by a day trip to The Great Ocean Road, operated by Wildlife Tours and involving a 7am pick up and a near 10pm return. Even with the long day it’s a spectacular drive, along a 300km stretch of some of Australia’s most stunning coastline, peppered with sandy beaches and huge rock formations jutting out of the sea. It offered me my first view of a Koala (no kangaroos yet though). There was even a rainforest on the route.

In an effort to save money I spent Thursday wandering around Queen Victoria market, where I was able to pick up a kangaroo fillet for dinner (tasting report = bloody delicious. Gamey and tender) and a trip to ACMI, the Australian Centre for Moving Image, a free and interactive museum focussing on the rise of Film/TV/Digital Entertainment in Australia. It was actually a lot of fun, incorporating classic movie clips, interactive games and the ability to record yourself in Bullet-Time (remembering that The Matrix was filmed in Australia).

Tomorrow I finally leave on the overnight bus to Sydney. Hopefully my time there will go slightly smoother than the start of my time in Melbourne.

Fiji - or 'how a week without the internet is actually awesome'

 To try to sum up the last week I’ve had in Fiji strikes me as almost impossible. I’ve seen very little of the country itself (Fiji is made up of dozens of islands and my journey here has been limited to two) yet I feel like I’ve seen a great deal about Fijians. The hospitality and the sense of family I’ve felt this week is not one I expected to find anywhere on my trip; yet I suppose that if it were to come from anywhere then Fiji would’ve been the leading candidate.

I landed in Nadi, the third largest town and jumping-off point for all island hopping, in the middle of a downpour and the rain continued throughout my first weekend here. I was pretty sure at this stage that my luck with the weather had followed me from New Zealand, and England being knocked out of the rugby hardly helped. During this weekend I was also introduced to the Fijian ritual of drinking Kava, a powdered root that is mixed with water and used for “special” ceremonies. What happens in mainland Fiji, or at least to me, is that the owner of the restaurant you dine at offers to show you ‘the real Fiji’, leads you to his mate’s shop where you drink Kava as a welcome ceremony and you’re then compelled to buy some local handicraft in return for their generosity. Cue an old-style Fijian club being packaged and sent home and me leaving slightly lighter of cash for the privilege.

I was here. Actually here!

All this changed on Monday, when I set sail for Mana Lagoon Backpackers on Mana Island. Upon arrival I was greeted with the Bula song (Bula being a Fijian all purpose greeting/”cheers” word) from the staff, who all took time to introduce themselves to me. The weather started to slightly improve, though not much, and I was ushered to a room that would make prison accommodation look like a 5* hotel. A mixed bag, for sure. My first night on Mana I discovered I shared my room with three mice, who I had to ask repeatedly to keep it down as their fun and games were disturbing my sleep.

Fire Dancing

Then the next day the sun came out and suddenly I saw why everyone falls in love with Fiji. Mana Island was transformed into a paradise and I realised that you spend so little time in your room that the reason their basic is because anything more would be a waste. During the days I would sit on the beach reading and at night the staff would arrange entertainment (Island Dancing, involving fire and knife dances was easily my favourite). Then we would sit up until the small hours drinking Kava together whilst Ronnie, one of the staff, would play guitar. It was, to all intents and purposes, a little like a hippy commune, only without the bad smell.

I was talked into a SCUBA course that occupied me for most of the days with a lot of reading and testing before making my first four dives on Wednesday and Thursday. To be honest, it’s hard to find a better way of studying than just lying on a beach reading about the potential for your lungs to explode inside of your body if you don’t breathe out when surfacing. My first two dives (to 6m) passed with little incident, though my inability to properly equalise on my first dive gave me a migraine that lasted all night). My second two dives, to 18m and 9m, had a little more incident. My fourth dive in particular consisted of my swallowing a mouthful of seawater (which should be almost impossible) and then some frantic swimming a little while later when a giant ray decided it was going to take an unhealthy interest in us; tail raised and all. At the time I didn’t realise how much trouble we were potentially in until the instructor Tuks told me on the boat afterwards “man, that f*cking ray…I’ve never been so scared underwater than when it moved towards us”. Tuks dives roughly 3 times a day and has been diving for 15+ years. Guess I nearly became the English Steve Irwin.

Sunset

When it was eventually time to leave Mana, after 5 days of sunburn and good times, I have to say I felt a pang of sadness. I can’t describe just how relaxing it was to not have the internet or my phone to distract me. It meant that you actually formed bonds with the people around you as you all pretty much became friends by default. But back to reality I came, and tonight I’m faced with a late night flight to Melbourne…

Auckland (Part Two)

Auckland is a city big enough to warrant more than one blog entry, especially as the last was done whilst I was waiting to throw myself off a bridge. I may have overlooked a few things.

That, to be honest dear reader, is the crux of it. Auckland, and New Zealand, offer so much to do that you almost forget what you did yesterday in anticipation of what you will do today.

A trip to Waiheke Island to visit some of their wineries was on the pre-rugby agenda last Saturday. We were able to take in the incredible scenery and get nicely lubricated in anticipation of the rugby. The Around Waiheke tour company’s half day trip was affordable and, whilst a little rough and ready, took in three great wineries including Wild on Waiheke , where we were also able to taste some great beers, and Kennedy Point, the only 100% organic winery in New Zealand.

There’s also Sky City, mentioned in my previous blog, where you can take a trip to the observation deck and enjoy the highest coffee in town. Nothing quite like a Chai Latte whilst the sun goes down (yes…that read a little effeminate).

New Zealand also continues its fine run of destroying my health. Alongside the incredible Fergburger in Queenstown, the brownies from Rotorua and the overwhelming urge NZ has to put at least one of Bacon, Egg and Cheese on everything savoury (and some things not) comes The White Lady – a burger van located inside of an old tram cart serving high quality burgers at all hours of the night. Good god this place is killing me.

Today’s activity though overshadowed them all as the AJ Hackett Bungy Company very kindly threw me off Auckland Harbour Bridge. The nerves I felt whilst climbing up almost made me overlook the incredible view of the city it offered. Still I managed to (shakily) get a photo and carry on climbing. Then came the overwhelming task of getting myself harnessed up and slowly edging towards the bungee platform. I can honestly say I have never experienced anything like the feeling I had looking over the edge knowing I’d have to jump. I managed to pose like a badass for the camera in front of me, whilst the camera to the side captured the true scale of my nerves. Then suddenly it was time and against every instinct I threw myself forward.

Post-jump. That's half adrenaline, half relief

Do it. That’s all I can say to you. Just do it.   

New Zealand has been great; Australia has a lot to live up to. But first…Fiji

Auckland (and a little bit of Taupo)

Sky City

Auckland is a city that seems to want to be a bit of everything. Huge 1980s skyscrapers rise out of the skyline containing all of the major New Zealand banks, whilst smaller buildings house a range of local-style bars and the waterfront tries to capture the night-time clubbing vibe of other waterfront cities. Standing amidst it all is the SkyCity, a 200+ meter needle that stands above everything and provides stunning views of the city from its 202m observation deck.

Arriving in Auckland last Friday we quickly went out and had a scout around the town and found it to be comparable to most major cities in so much as the price of dinner and beer was immediately higher than most other places we’ve been. Not by a great amount, but enough to notice. That being said there are some great places worth visiting, including The Bluestone Room which is located in the oldest commercial building in town and has a well in the floor that the earliest settlers used to draw water. They also do beer towers, which are very cool.

Bagrock in action

On Friday night, the night before England vs Scotland, we headed to the Vector Arena to the Spirit of Bannockburn festival – a night of Scottish revelry featuring the Red Hot Chilli Pipers, purveying BagRock (a blend of Bagpipes and Rock Music) and Des McLean (reputedly Billy Connolly’s favourite comedian). Never have I seen so many kilts in one place and the mood was jovial, if decidedly anti-English. If you get the chance to check out the Chilli Pipers I can only recommend it, if only because there’s nothing stranger than hearing We Will Rock You played on bagpipes.

Speaking of kilts everywhere, the England vs Scotland game at the 65,000 capacity Eden Park was a near sell-out with loads of passion from both sets of fans and paying out for our half-way line seats was a great move as we had a great view of all of the action. Just a shame that the game wasn’t up to the hype until Chris Ashton’s stunning late try. But a win’s a win and the atmosphere inside the ground more than made up for the poor rugby on display.

Yet another missed Wilko kick...

For a break from the city we headed to Taupo, a small town on a lake about 5 hours away from Auckland. The bad weather we’ve been experiencing managed to follow us on the first day, where we holed up inside of our hostel to participate in the Beer Pong tournament. Myself and Simon (a fellow travelling rugby fan we first met in Dunedin) managed to make it to the Semi-Finals before finally being eliminated by a pair of 60+ year olds…words cannot describe the humiliation.

Orakei Korako

The next day was spent visiting the Orakei Korako geothermal geysers, a short 30 minute drive out of the town. Utterly incredible scenery awaited us, along with the overpowering stench of sulphur belched out from the Earth every so often. Still, it looked like nothing else on earth and made for a pleasant afternoon trip.

Now I’m back in Auckland. The sun is shining. There’s a nice breeze. And I’ve foolishly agreed to o and jump off the Harbour Bridge on a Bungy…..oh crap….